RECIPE
FOR RIGHT RELATIONSHIPS
By Rev. William Claire Greiner
Colossians
3:14-17—"And above all
these things put on love, which is the bond of perfectness. And let the
peace of God rule in your hearts, to the which also ye are called in one
body; and be ye thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in
all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and
spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord. And
whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus,
giving thanks to God and the Father by Him."
I. LET THE LOVE OF CHRIST
MOTIVATE YOU
Verse 14: "And above
all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfectness."
Paul is speaking here of agape
love — unselfish, sacrificial love. This kind of love is different from
human love. Human love has limits. Human love is based on feelings, and it
can be totally lost, regardless of how strong it is (the love between
husbands & wives, parents and children, etc.).
God’s love is action.
John 3:16— "For God
so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever
believeth in Him should not perish but have everlasting life."
God so loved that He GAVE!
What did He give? He gave HIMSELF!
Agape love is giving oneself
to another person’s legitimate need. Agape love is something I not only
feel, but something I do, regardless of how I feel. (See 1 Corinthians
13.) Sometimes the other person might not be too lovable, but I can choose
to love Him with agape love.
Regardless of changes, it is
no excuse for not loving another person.
One man described the change
in his wife with the following bit of poetry:
Before I married Maggie dear
I was her pumpkin pie,
Her precious peach and honey boy,
The apple of her eye.
But after years of married life
This thought I pause to utter,
Those fancy names are now all gone,
I’m just her bread and butter.
Paul speaks of love as being a
"bond of perfectness" — a bond that produces maturity and
completeness. Agape love will bring wholeness to relationships.
II. LET THE PEACE OF GOD REGULATE
YOU.
Verse 15: "And let the peace of God
rule in your hearts, to the which also ye are called in one body; and be
ye thankful." Lit. "let
it act as a referee . . . as an umpire . . . to call the decisions."
All too often our emotions (anger,
irritability, frustrations) control our actions and responses in our
relationships. When people are up-tight, they send conflicting and
confusing messages.
Christians should manifest the peace of
God which passes all understanding (and misunderstandings).
Philippians 4:6,7 -- "Be anxious for
nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving,
let your request be made known unto God, and the peace of God which passes
all understanding shall keep [put a garrison around] your heart and mind
through Christ Jesus."
Notice that Paul adds in Colossians 3:15: "and
be thankful." The present tense here indicates continual action,
a continual giving of thanks that becomes a habit of life.
III. LET THE WORD OF GOD PENETRATE YOU.
Verse 16: "Let the Word of Christ
dwell in you richly in all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in
psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to
the Lord."
The word "dwell" here
means "to take up residence in" your heart and mind. Let
the Word of God make its home in your emotions and intellect. It should
have free rein in our homes. "Take up residence" suggests
"total-home access"— the kitchen, the living room, the
TV room ... all governed by the eternal Word of God.
"Let the Word dwell in you in all
wisdom." We need the wisdom
of God in our relationships and in building our families for eternity.
Proverbs 24:3 (Amplified): "Through
skillful and godly wisdom is a house (a life, a home, a family) built, and
by understanding it is established on a sound and good foundation. And by
knowledge shall the chamber of its every area be filled with all precious
and pleasant riches."
James 1:5 -- "If any man lack wisdom,
let him ask of God, Who giveth to all men liberally."
Wisdom is needed in raising our children
and in dealing with our partners.
Let the Word of God reside in your heart
and home in all its richness, giving you wisdom for family living.
Then Paul adds: "Teaching and
admonishing one another." This is the same thought as Ephesians
4:19: "Let no corrupt
communication proceed out of your mouth, but only that which is good to
the use of edifying that it may minister grace to the hearers."
We are to practice the ministry of
edification, that of building one another up in the things of God.
Ephesians 6:4 "Bring up your children
in the nurture (discipline) and admonition of the Lord."
The Bible should be our final and sole
authority in life and in our relationships. How many of us are so living
that our children & grandchildren will remember us by our faithfulness
to the God’s Word?
IV. LET THE LORDSHIP OF CHRIST ACTIVATE
YOU.
Verse 17: "And whatsoever (no matter
what it is) you do in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord
Jesus (under His authority), giving thanks to God and the Father by
Him."
The Lordship of Christ will activate us to
obedience. It will cause us to be submissive and grateful. For Jesus to be
Lord means He is at the center. He is the hub of the wheel.
Paul goes on in the next verses of chapter
3 to talk about our responsibilities in our relationship, in particular
the home, where Jesus Christ reigns as Lord.
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